I've decided I'm no good without a trainer of my own. Really. I can ride decently when I put some work into it but left to my own devices...I'm lazy. That's right, I admit it.
What's wrong with jogging my H/J TB like a western horse so I can sit the trot? Maybe, just maybe, because then I never build up the strength and balance to post? Oh yeah, that's right.
But having a trainer just does something to my brain. I can't fail them. I will post until I fall off the horse dead before I complain. I always try my hardest to do anything they ask. I'm learning to ask questions instead of getting anxious or frustrated. I never thought about it before but having given a few beginner lessons to kids myself I can tell you I can't stand when someone doesn't listen to me and try to do what I'm asking. They don't have to get it right, they just have to acknowledge me and try to get it. I guess maybe that makes me a good student although I don't think that's why I do it. It's an ego thing. I don't want to embarass myself, I want to be good at this. I want it so much and I have my whole life.
I had a fabulous lesson on Tax on Wednesday. It's like something just clicked into place. I had felt really off balance posting when we first started and I was recovering from surgery. All of a sudden my legs feel velcroed into place. My shoulders finally feel far enough back. Tax feels relaxed in his frame and forward in his movement. I even got a "that looks so much better; very good" from the trainer.
Do you know what that means to a h/j trainer? Toture time is just getting started. Time to start posting for an hour 3-5 days a week to build up my strength and muscle memory. Besides it's good for the horse. Am I regretting all the days I made my sister post without stirrups when we were kids? Nah...not really.
I watched her other student, Homer's dad canter big slow circles around the arena popping over fences every now and then and was just a little jealous. I am patient, I am patient, I am patient....breathe. Can I canter now? We should be able to start tonight as long as things go well. I'm also going to ride Promise for my sister because she's out of town. I'll let you know how it goes.